I’m dishing. After over 4 years of excessive hair loss and losing 75% of the hair on my head, I am finally on the upswing and have been dying to share some legit tips and advice. When I first started searching for answers all those years ago, I felt overwhelmed… I felt like the articles I would read were barely helpful, outdated, and didn’t get how much I was actually freaking out by this with their sub-par advice!! If I read one more time to rub coconut oil on my head I was going to lose my mind… guys, when you’re hair is literally falling out… COCONUT OIL MAKES IT COME OUT EVEN MORE. Thanks. Spoiler Alert. This article will not mention that, promise. I remember thinking, “oh man I am going to write an epic post when I finally figure this shit out”… well, guys, this isn’t something you can just completely fix or figure out sometimes. Some of us, sure, it’s temporary and will bounce back… others it might not ever, some of us might see some improvements yet don’t know if it’ll ever really be the same. All of these scenarios are okay, you will find ways around it. Where there’s a will, there’s a way and where there’s self-love, true healing can come – I promise. Notice I said “I am finally on the upswing”, not, I’m “healed” or “I fixed it”, because I truly do understand that there are cycles of loss and growth, there are triggers that can make the loss worse, and that stressing over it constantly doesn’t fix a damn thing and just perpetuates it! There’s no true arrival or destination on a journey with hair loss, but there are better days and times when you’re not sad or obsessing or confused at who’s staring back at you in that mirror. There can be a time when you realize you’re finally making progress and your body is healing – and it can be truly amazing to experience. I write this post with some humor, tough love, and sweet sweet love because I truly know the depression that comes with this. Darling, I really hope this helps you on your journey.
ALRIGHT ALREADY. Let’s cut to the chase. Here is my advice.
1. FIND OUT WHY THIS IS HAPPENING and DON’T SETTLE.
For 3 years after getting off birth control… my hair fell out in clumps. Constantly. After the first year or so… my hair was permanently worn back in an ever-shrinking bun. I was desperate for answers, panicking, my Mom was crying over it when she’d see me… and doctors had NOTHING to say about it except, “sorry hun, you look normal to me”, “nothing shows up in your blood”, “maybe you’re aging…?”, “give it some time, sometimes the pill has weird side effects”, “are you really stressed?”, “you know you could always just use Rogaine… but for life, you can’t get off it”. WOW, THANKS.
I spent so much money on ridiculous products that burned my scalp or did absolutely nothing. I had it in my head that it was the hormonal imbalances or the PCOS (though I don’t have the high testosterone male-hair-loss type). Finally, when a doctor confirmed it was Hashimoto’s (An Autoimmune Disease that affects the Thyroid and the Thyroid is underactive or hypo-). Hair loss is a major symptom of both hypothyroid and Hashimoto’s which I had persistently been asking to be tested for… I will tell you right now, many conventional doctors and Endocrinologists do not test for this properly, if you suspect you have either of these, please do yourself a favor and go to a Naturopath, Integrative Medicine Doctor, or Functional Medicine Doctor. They will get you proper testing done, invest the money — you’re worth it.
Finally with this diagnosis, was I able to have some direction, I wasn’t chasing my tail and going insane with trying to figure it all out. The course of action was medicine for me, my thyroid was so low on hormones… I had no energy, I was feeling depressed, my joint pain was out of control… and I was ready to do something about it. I did make the decision to take natural desiccated thyroid, which is medication, (WP Thyroid brand) and after finding my proper dose, the hair fall started diminishing. *If you currently take Synthroid for either of these conditions and see hair loss, consider the natural version as it provides you with both T3 and T4 hormones and may improve this. Ask your doctor about it.*
Also, accept it might not just be one reason or another. Your body has A LOT going on and so do you, there are many factors that contribute to hair loss, figure out these contributing factors and get on them.
To sum up: If you don’t know why your hair is falling out, find out why. A Functional/Integrative Medicine doctor is my recommendation for finding out why. A Naturopath can also help run relevant tests. You know your body, and you have to take control.
2. KEEP YOUR STRESS IN CHECK AND CUT THE SUGAR.
No matter what the “root cause” of the loss is… especially for women, hormone imbalances are usually at play with hair loss. In some way or another. When we talk about hormone imbalances, we have to look at two things: your blood sugar & your adrenals. Why? When your body is under stress (commonly caused by eating sugar, living a stressful life, and overall living in a fight or flight zone), your body is in survival mode. It thinks you are under attack constantly and cannot prioritize hair growth for you right now. Sorry, but more important things are going on. Your body has to prioritize making more cortisol (the hormone produced by your adrenals) so you can respond to this non-stop stress. So your priority of growing your hair just got moved to the bottom of the to-do list! The adrenals’ needs go above and beyond your other Endocrine organs’ needs and these are the organs that make hormones. Ovaries, Thyroid, etc. are all taking a back seat to what they need so your Adrenals can get what they need. Because your adrenals, in essence, are what’s keeping you alive (since you’re in the fight or flight response).
Here’s how you can attack this. Try doing a Whole30, get your sugar from sweet veggies and whole fruit and depending on how bad you are with your energy crashing (or hypoglycemia), kick your starches and fruits to the latter half of the day. Stop riding that blood sugar roller coaster, because it’s not doing you any favors. You’ll be cranky in the beginning. You might even hate me. But after a while, on the other side, you will be so freaking stoked!! Promise.
As for the stress, you KNOW what you have to do. Cut out toxic relationships, talk to a therapist or good friend you can confide in if you’re struggling with grief, loss, sadness… let it out. Journaling is a favorite coping mechanism of mine. Sometimes I can’t express it all verbally and I need to write it down to get it out. However you do it, do it. If nothing else, please make sure you are sleeping and if you’d like to try a few minutes of meditation, that will also be wonderful. We all have stress and a lot of it is hard to avoid, so improving your relationship with stress is the KEY.
To sum up: How are your 3 “S”s? Stress, Sugar, Sleep… check in on all of them, make sure you’re cutting the stress as best you can, cutting the sugar, and getting plenty of sleep. When these are out of whack, your body simply cannot act optimally.
3. KNOW YOUR BLOOD WORK & HISTORY, FIND SUPPLEMENTS & PRODUCTS YOU LOVE
I have been through them all, folks. Sad to say it. There’s a lot of absolute shit out there too, false claims, weird ingredients, I’ll spare you the details and let you know what I do like. But first, you have to know what your body needs before you can address the supplements. Everyone will tell you to take Biotin and YOU totally CAN IF YOU NEED IT. But confirm first, and don’t assume that’s the magic pill everyone makes it out to be. I personally was never low in it… so taking it obsessively and spending the money at first, just made me angry when I saw no change! Get some blood work done and find that out. A very common need in correlation with hair loss is: IRON & FERRITIN. Ferritin is the stored version of iron, so you need to get both tested and need to have ample amounts of both. Your iron could show up as perfectly normal in your labs, but if ferritin wasn’t tested, you didn’t get the full picture. You must have iron reserves for healthy hair.
To recap the labs I suggest you get (and ALWAYS get a copy for yourself to read)*:
- B vitamins including Biotin & B12 are crucial for hair, but are not a magic pill – see below for more factors.
- Iron (optimal levels: 80-120)
- Ferritin (optimal levels: 70-100)
- 25 OH Vitamin D3 (optimal levels: 80-90)
- DHEA (serum) (optimal levels: 200-380)
- Cortisol (serum) (optimal levels: morning: 10-15, afternoon: 6-10)
- Free Testosterone (serum) (optimal levels: 1.1-2.2)
- Thyroid Labs (TSH, TPO Antibodies, Thyroglobulin Antibodies, Free T3, Free T4, Reverse T3, Iodine, Selenium) – more info here.
*Disclaimer: These optimal ranges are from my notes from various resources such as SaraGottfriedMD.com, Hypothyroidmom.com, and Izabella Wentz’s Root Cause book, and of course in working with my own doctor. You will mainly see the conventional ranges on your lab work and it may differ, read up to confirm with your own research and medical support system. Also always combine your symptoms and how you feel with what you see on the piece of paper – blood work is a snapshot in time, but chronic symptoms are not to be ignored. This should not be used as medical advice but a resource in your toolkit to take control of your health.
Cortisol, Testosterone, and DHEA are testing hormones, if they’re out of balance, you know this could be issues with PCOS or general blood sugar dis-regulation which we covered in #2… your steps are to keep focusing on your blood sugar, stress, and sleep first and foremost. In general, I will also add, you should take a good multi-vitamin, a Fish Oil/EFA, and definitely Vitamin d3 which is also a hormone and helpful for hair health.
B-vitamins, Iron, and Ferritin you can supplement with but should definitely work on getting them in your food. If you’re vegetarian and vegan (which I was a few years ago when this all started), know that the quickest and most reliable way to get that iron up is through liver or liver tablets – I know that’s not what most people like to hear, but it seriously fixed it for me FAST. I wasn’t able to see a real difference until I introduced more animal protein back into my diet, that’s just how it worked for me. Sadly, all proteins are not created equal (plant & animal), but that’s a personal decision each person has to make. You can also consider trying collagen peptides in your morning coffee/tea or any liquid really! The amino acids from protein and collagen are helpful for nails, skin, and hair. I take it pretty regularly. Here are my faves: collagen creamer & collagen peptides.
I also currently take Nutrafol Supplements which consist of adaptogens, vitamins, and minerals targeted to help you adapt to stress and to give the body what it needs to support your hair. There’s a women’s and men’s formulation so they can focus on the common reasons each gender has for hair loss. I was skeptical at first.. by the time I came across this supplement, I was up to my wit’s end of hair supplements, but I actually love this one. I’ve taken it for over 4 months now – It’s helped me with both the hair falling and the strength of it. I’ve noticed a considerable difference with this added on to my thyroid meds.
I also use a few different products, I LOVE Monat Brand (FYI- I DO NOT SELL IT). Their volume line seriously gives my hair extra oomph that stays all day. I also love Rahua Beauty for the same reason (the volume formulas) or Laritelle. None of these options are necessarily cheap, I wish they were – but this is what works for me. I steer clear of masks because they make my hair come out and clog my follicles, even the natural oil/egg/avocado ones. If anything, I’ll rub some coconut oil on my ends and leave them for 20 mins before the shower since Hashimoto’s hair can get very dry. But never on the roots – proceed with caution. I also wash my hair every other day or so. I went through a time when I got advice that my follicles had to be cleaned daily so I washed it daily and cried at how much hair was in the drain all the time… I had to pull back from it. Every other day works well for me. I’ve also read that washing it much less is better, but that makes my head itchy and I can’t go that long. Do what works for you, that’s what will be best and find a product that doesn’t irritate you, that you can afford, and that will keep your scalp clean, as that is important so that oil isn’t clogging up your follicles when they’re already in a sensitive state. Try not to use too much product, very little to none. All I really use is some heat protectant from Monat when I know I’m going to blow dry it and that’s it.
Also! Speak to your fam. Find out if any women in your family or extended family (aunts, grandmothers, mom, cousins, etc.) have gone through or are going through this. Pool your resources and investigate. Realize that they might not have answers, but knowing that it’s in your family will help conversations with your medical team and perhaps you now have more support on trying things together. I found out AFTER my diagnosis that several of my aunts on my father’s side have had major thyroid issues, one even had hers removed MORE THAN ONCE (it grows back… crazy, right?) and they’ve all suffered from hair loss and thinning. While they had some suggestions, it was helpful to know I wasn’t alone or crazy! hahaha but I also kept searching.
To sum up: Know your levels, family history, and record your symptoms for your own records and for working with medical & wellness professionals. Address this appropriately through diet and supplements to support your body’s natural healing process. Products like shampoos are great, but be wary of hair re-growth claims. Healing needs to come from the inside first, find products that make your scalp feel good and clean, and make your hair look voluminous!
[bctt tweet=”When it comes to female hair loss, there are a lot of factors! Know what yours are to address it, then LET GO and be patient.” username=”foodbymars”]
4. NOW, LET GO AND DO WHAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO FEEL CONFIDENT
Great, you’ve gotten the tests… you’re taking the supplements, you’ve come a long way with the reduction in sugar and stress and your hair smells like flowers and scalp is squeaky clean! NOW, WHAT? Let. It. Go. Do not beat yourself up anymore, you’ve put steps into motion and the best thing you can do going forward is to LOVE YOURSELF UNCONDITIONALLY. Stop the faces in the mirror, the sarcasm about your hair never growing, any and all self-deprecating talk as best you can. I still work on this and have my days when I just don’t care and we all do… but put in the effort and it can get better. Say POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS in the mirror instead of tugging on your hair or looking sad. Be thankful that our body is TAKING CARE OF YOU by doing whatever it’s doing. I made peace with my hair loss when I really became so thankful that it was the predominant symptom and reason I kept looking for answers and got my diagnosis. Our bodies are communicating with us, and THAT’S A BIG DEAL. Don’t respond to it by saying “I don’t want to hear your problems, figure it out”. LISTEN TO IT, support it, and be patient.
A big issue with women losing their hair, is they associate it with their beauty and confidence. I know I have. As the saying goes… a bad hair day is a bad day. They say this because, through statistics and polls, it’s proven, that when someone has a bad hair day, they have a negative attitude which ends up royally screwing up their whole damn day! I remember hearing that when I was a kid and well when you have nothing but bad hair days for years… you really start to believe it! Of course, I couldn’t let it cripple me, I’d feel even worse when I’d say no to social engagements just because I’d prefer to hide out. I’d feel bad when I put so much focus on it, knowing there was “so much worse” that could be happening. But none of that helped, I just wanted to feel and look like myself and it was a nagging thought, feeling, and insecurity that kept growing and growing.
Finally, one day, I couldn’t take it anymore. I ran to my hairstylist and asked her to put in extensions. I finally felt like I had no other options… until most of it was all gone and I’d need a wig. Well, she had to tell me some hard truth… my hair wasn’t strong enough to hold extensions. I held my composure, said thanks… and left in tears with no one seeing. I went home and didn’t tell my husband… he was already feeling so sad to watch me go through this, I couldn’t make it worse. So I let it fester, I tried finding hairstyles to cover it… but basically found myself giving up, just slicking it back wet and going about my life… trying to convince myself I accepted it. And this was already by the time I started thyroid medication, but it took a long time to find the right dose and to see the changes happening.
Through the medication, through years of an improving diet, through adding in some helpful supplements, by saying positive affirmations in the mirror instead of sighing or making faces, and by giving in a bit to just surrender and love myself... I started to see a ton of new hairs on my scalp which I had seen before… but I’d see them come and go pretty quickly. Not this time. I started seeing them get longer and longer… and a bit less and less falling out. It’s so gradual you can almost miss it sometimes, but it’s there if you watch closely. I realized my hair was getting stronger and I could even blow dry it a bit (I had stopped altogether for a very long time, it was too stressful to see all the hair coming out).
Once I realized it was stronger, I found some lightweight clip-in extensions to help me grow it out and fill in the spaces at the bottom. I’m very lucky that my scalp remained covered with no spots, but the bottoms are a different story… that’s where I can see it very prominently. And to me, it makes me look sick. That might not be how anyone else views it, but I know myself and that’s how it makes me feel. I couldn’t do it anymore and I didn’t want to hide anymore. So some days, my hair is back, and sometimes, I place one thin row in the back so I can wear it down, confidently… and have a GREAT hair day. It doesn’t pull my hair out and I alternate days with it to give myself a break. It’s been a blessing in disguise for me. A part of me was embarrassed to share it, but then I remembered that there are some of us suffering from this and we need to talk about it. We need ideas and help. And if I can even help one person, this journey has been worth it.
Also, HELLO, many women wear extensions and wigs. Many of these models, fashionistas, and fabulous fashion bloggers that women look up to… are wearing them. Just check it out on Youtube if you don’t believe me! And they’re doing it FOR FUN. Not because they’ve lost so much hair they don’t know what else to do. FUN, remember that? Have fun with your hair, take care of it, honor your body, and go easy on yourself. Your body is doing what it has to and these tips can help you to support it and take some of the burdens off. All the while, life doesn’t stop, and you should love what you see in the mirror. You should strut your stuff, not hide and show the world your smiling face so you can enjoy your life.
Maybe extensions aren’t your thing, and a beautiful clip or hat is. Maybe you want to try rocking a pixie cut, bob, or another cut suited for you! Whatever you try, have fun with it, and don’t take yourself so seriously. One thing I had to learn is… no one else is watching that closely. They’re not obsessing over it as you may be, they just want to see you happy. You’re alive, you’re beautiful, and this will not defeat you.
Everything was confirmed for me that I was moving in the right direction when my long-time hairdresser confirmed how much healthier it was, how much stronger, and how happy she was to see it! I was over the moon. She also helped blend the extensions in more for me (which I highly advise you do if you buy them).
**FYI – No one really tells you this gem. But after excessive hair loss, when your hair does grow back … it’s different. It’s usually not the same texture and can feel like baby hair. It might not be the same curly or straight hair you had before, it’ll have new quirks and without the extra hair weight you used to have to hold it in place in a certain direction, you may notice funky things. I personally have a frizzy patch in the back now (what thaaaa…?)- that shit needs extra attention when I blow dry it LOL, it curls in strange places now, and is very soft and can get dry in some places. I realize this is now probably making you re-think wanting to re-grow your hair, HAHAH, but stick with it. As more hair grows, it will get better, and if you try extensions that extra weight can even help. And as more of the follicular cycles pass and your hair sheds and re-grows, it will strengthen. It’s a slow process but nonetheless happening, hang in there!!**
I truly hope this helped you. When I say I tried nearly ALL THE PRODUCTS, I have. I wonder how many vacations I could have gone on with the money I wasted. The ones I listed, I’m not affiliated with at all right now… they just have actually worked and have made me feel more confident. They’re not harming me and I did a lot of research before trying them. Try not to get overwhelmed at all the health claims, studies, and hair loss articles out there – because the truth is, there are a million reasons why it can be happening. By following these steps, you can get closer to figuring out why it’s specifically happening to YOU so you can take control of putting support in place for your body, and then let go because it TAKES TIME and you still need to live and be happy without obsessing over it. What’s harder than buying a product, is the part about self-care and self-love, which is a constant practice in a world that wants us to feel bad in order to buy things to feel better… do not let this hold you back, and do not forget to stop and enjoy life as it is, right now. Hopefully, these tips can support you in doing so while your body can do its thing. I’ll leave you with a mantra that helps me…
I trust my life. I trust my body. Every day, I’m healing.
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